More Pet Peeves… =)
Because I seem to continue to get annoyed at little things lately…..
Women who don’t use the toilet seat liners but instead splash their pee all over the toilet seat in a public restroom. Because that’s just what I needed, your piss to soak through the toilet liner I laid down. Assholes.
Pubic hair. The long straggly kind you could practically braid. On either men or women, this is just a tad too bohemian for me. Shave it all off (preferred) or at least keep it tightly trimmed…. Just as I do for you as a courtesy, so too should men do for me because when I’m sucking your dick, I don’t want to be flossing my teeth on your nut-sack hair.
Tightwads. If you have the money, spend it. Enjoy it. Because guess what – when you die, you don’t get to bribe God to get your lame ass into heaven. What are you gonna do, be buried in $100 bills? So if you want the $200 chair, buy it. Because when you’re 95 and wrinkly and trolling the nursing home, you’re gonna be glad you got your boobs done because those silicone lumps will still be perky and not drooping down to your knees.
Lazy people. We all like to relax sometimes and just veg. However, slovenly pigs who don’t do anything drive me nuts. I have a lot to do – I work obnoxious hours, I maintain my house, I write, I clean, I work on remodeling my brother’s farm, I have to go drink =) I keep it going…. People who just lay around all the time should just be shot – they’d take up less oxygen.
Proper English. I think we’ve all learned, I’m a punctuation and grammar whore. I can’t help it. I can forgive little things, but an entire paragraph with no punctuation, blatant misspellings, misuse of their/they’re, your/you’re etc…. just drives me up a fucking wall. Take your time – think about what you want to say and pretend you’ve at least graduated from high school and can put a proper sentence together using the English language.
Tiny penises. Ok, I’m sorry Tiny Tim, but while size isn’t everything, it does need to be at least as big as say, a piece of Italian sausage. Miniature cocktail weenie is not going to work because I have a vagina that, while it is still nice and very tight, is not the size of a pinhead. So your Vienna sausage is not going to do much for me and it’s really hard to fake pleasure when you’re not even sure if the guy’s dick is in you. If you are so endowed, I’d strongly recommend surgical enhancement, pills, pumps, something – because unless you find a dwarf with said pinhead-sized vagina, you’re gonna get more laughs than you will ass.
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I agree. that double standard along the lines of shaving is so disgusting. I dated a guy that demanded me completely cleanly shaven everyday (which is impossible) yet he had a forest of hair down there. I finally was like.. unless you want mine mirroring yours, you are gonna shave that crap
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oh goodness, do I agree with you or WHAT. I absolutely hate when men do not shave. It is disgusting the double standard they hold.
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