Girls have dirty minds too…

Ok, I think my dear readers have learned by now that I have a dirty mind.  A really dirty mind.  It’s hard for me to NOT think about sex all the time because it’s such an inherent desire and emotion for me.  I just can’t help it.

 Case in point, we had a company-wide (for all finance-related associates) 3^rd Quarter Finance Review meeting this morning.  Now keep in mind, around 95% of our management is comprised of a population with a third arm between their legs.  As such, I have man after man standing up in front of me to present their little tid bit for the quarter, as well as men surrounding me on all sides.  Now how in the hell am I, a sexual deviant, NOT supposed to have the following thoughts?

 I wonder how big his cock is.  Does he even call it a cock or does he refer to it as a dick because cock is too raunchy a word for a business excecutive?  He’s short but he’s a pretty confident guy (many of our Exec’s are short-statured) so I think he’s got a nice thick cock.  His wife is really tiny though (true story – the short Exec’s here also all have tiny little wives) so maybe his dick is just an Average Joe (see previous posting on a glossary of Penis definitions) because his wife is so tiny, she wouldn’t really want a gigantic cock because she was probably a good conservative chick and has only slept with him so she wouldn’t know any better.  [seriously – this kind of shit goes through my head EVERY DAY]

 I wonder if he fucks like a rocking horse, back and forth, very rhythmic, or if he’s more like a jackhammer, pounding for all his worth.

 Wonder if he’s like a pogo stick, boingy boingy boingy or more like a slinky, falling in and then slowly pulling out, falling in, then slowly pulling out.

 I wonder if he’s a talker, calling his wife his little bitch whore, take it, bitch, take it all! Or if he’s more of just a grunter…uuuuhhhh  uuuhhhh  uuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh

 I wonder if he’s a spanker, plowing his wife from behind, smacking her ass and calling her Sally!

 I wonder if he’s a nipple biter, making his wife grind his face into her tits more, or if he’s a polite nibbler.

 I wonder if he likes his salad tossed, a little finger in the ass or he’s a strict missionary/straddle/doggie style kind of guy.

 I wonder if his wife has a suction cup dildo in their shower like I do – do you suppose she fucks herself with it while she sucks his cock in the shower? God – I wonder if they even HAVE shower sex…

 And so it goes, a morning Finance meeting with me wondering how my bosses are in bed.

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Tags: executives, sex

This entry was posted on November 18, 2009 at 10:16 am and is filed under Random tidbits and insight. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.