Dear Abby – Cut The Fucking Cord!
DEAR ABBY: My mother is my best friend, but I can’t stop yelling at her for invading my privacy. I have just learned that she has read all my journals since I was 9. She also figured out all my passwords to my e-mail, online blogs and social network accounts.
I have lived away from home for six years. I no longer feel I can leave my mother alone in my apartment because she goes through my text messages, call list, letters, bills, bank statements, etc. I have now stopped writing, which was my only outlet of expression, because of her snooping. She says I hurt her feelings when I yell, but I have reached the end of my rope.
I have had calm conversations with her about this. She always promises that she’ll stop, but she never does. Abby, she has no reason to snoop — I talk to her 20 times a day. How can I keep this from ruining our relationship? — MAD IN MANHATTAN
WOW – where to start with this one…..so many options.
First – if you were to start writing about fucking a different cock every night of the week, your mother would probably stop reading all your shit.
Second – why is your mother staying in your apartment without you there? My mother would never come over to hang out at my house without me there – that’s just weird.
Third – you talk to your mother 20 fucking times a day? Hi – you born about 25 years ago and I’m pretty sure they cut your umbilical cord the day you were born. No normal person talks to their mother 20 times a day. Jesus Christ – I love my boyfriend and I couldn’t call him 20 times a day – what the hell is there to talk about?
Fourth – your mother has figured out all your passwords? What are you using, your birthday? It’s called coming up with something creative, memorizing it and using it for everything. Such as cock694ever or something, you idiot.
Fifth – change the locks on your apartment and do not give your mother a key – that way, she can’t come over uninvited and just chill out and snoop.
Sixth – get a small safe and keep all your important documents in it – away from your mother’s prying eyes. DO NOT make the combination your birthday!
Seriously chick – cut the cord. Maybe I’m just lucky that I have a mother who I love, who respects my privacy and would prefer to never read about my sex life.
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hi mate, excellent site Happy Holidays!
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LMAO I thought it was crazy this chick's mother is going through her mail, emails, bills, texts, etc… I mean come on! My mother would prefer to have NO working knowledge of the details of my life – why can't this chick cut the cord already?
I just don't like snooping – I will always be open and honest and have nothing to hide from you.
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xtine Reply:
March 6th, 2011 at 2:50 pm
After reading through the "Dear Abby" speech and the "Corporate Cocks" article I swear we are sisters from another mother! Finally found another honest woman in the world who drops f bombs as much as I do
I used to live in Akron, OH…we must be exposed to some toxic element up there that made us this way. Keep the laughs, slamming, and sarcasm coming, girl!
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sjtavo Reply:
March 8th, 2011 at 4:21 pm
LOL Thanks Chicka! We Ohio chicks must think alike – as we deal with the same fucking bullshit in life LMAO
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sjtavo Reply:
March 8th, 2011 at 4:21 pm
LOL Thanks Chicka! We Ohio chicks must think alike – as we deal with the same fucking bullshit in life LMAO
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xtine Reply:
March 6th, 2011 at 2:50 pm
After reading through the "Dear Abby" speech and the "Corporate Cocks" article I swear we are sisters from another mother! Finally found another honest woman in the world who drops f bombs as much as I do
I used to live in Akron, OH…we must be exposed to some toxic element up there that made us this way. Keep the laughs, slamming, and sarcasm coming, girl!
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