Dear Abby: These People Are MORONS
DEAR ABBY: My husband, “Harry,” and I had a good marriage for 25 years, but we have grown apart and have agreed to divorce when our child finishes college. We just don’t have a lot in common anymore. Harry is on the road a lot, and I have my own business.
My problem is I have fallen in love with Harry’s cousin “Cyrus.” We met 25 years ago at my sister-in-law’s house and were instantly attracted. My mother-in-law reintroduced us five years ago so we could put together a business deal, and we became close. Cyrus is successful, and he’s generous to me and my child. I have been secretly in love with him all these years, and now he has fallen in love with me, too.
Because I plan to leave Harry does not mean I want to leave his family. I have a wonderful mother-in-law and great sisters-in-law, and I love being a part of their family. I enjoy the weddings, family reunions and even the memorial services.
When I divorce Harry and marry Cyrus, I plan to remain part of the family, but my sisters-in-law do not approve, and they no longer want to continue our friendship. If it doesn’t bother my soon-to-be-ex-husband, why should my continuing to attend family reunions bother them? And will time heal all wounds? — GOING CRAZY IN ALABAMA
Dear Going Crazy in Alabama – Welcome to your clusterfuck. Sorry chicka, but that’s the way it goes. When you get divorced, you divorce his family as well. And what makes you think, when the whole family finds out that you have left your husband and are marrying another member of the family that they are even going to want to have anything to do with you?? Would you??? “Oh, this is June – she was married to my brother for 25 years, they have three children. And this is my cousin Dick, who is now married to Jane. Dick’s brother Tom is waiting for his turn at her.” LMAO
Marry his fucking cousin and prepare yourself for being called “that whore of a woman” for the rest of your natural-born life. I don’t care what you say, don’t tell me that having his cousin on the sidelines didn’t make you give up more easily on your marriage or make it easier to chose to get out of it – because you have his cousin waiting for you. I’ve tried that angle babes – and let me assure you, it is nothing short of a clusterfuck. Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuck, it’s a clusterfuck.
DEAR ABBY: Shortly before my wedding, I decided to have my teeth fixed. The dentist quoted me a price of $4,000, which my husband and I could not afford since we were paying for our entire wedding.
My parents agreed to pay the dental bill as soon as it arrived. However, there is now a “stipulation.” They are demanding the full list — including exact dollar amounts — of what EACH of our guests gave us for wedding gifts. If I refuse, my parents now say our previous verbal agreement is worthless, and my husband can cover my dental bill.
Am I wrong for not wanting to give them the dollar amount or tell them what each guest gave at our wedding? They call me at work and insist I tell them because they “must” know if their family and friends “disrespected” them. I feel that whatever people gave us is whatever they could afford, and my husband and I are very happy with the gifts we received. — NEWLYWED IN DARIEN, CONN.
Here’s what I vote for – write an email describing to your parents why you feel it is so inappropriate for them to request a detailed inventory of your wedding gifts from their friends and family to ensure that they were not “disrespected.” Reiterate that the fact that those people witnessed your union and helped you celebrate it mean the world to you, and their gifts to honor your wedding were welcomed and appreciated, regardless of their value. Then CC all of their friends and family.
Your parents sound like total dickheads. Fuck ‘em. Get on a payment plan for your teeth. Tell your parents to shove it. Actually, you won’t have to, because after you send that email out, they’ll have their hands full explaining why they are such materialistic assholes to everyone from Grandma Betty to Cousin Lou, as well as all of their closest friends.
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I have to say, I love your blog. Maybe you could let me know how I can go about keeping up to date with it? By the way I stumbled upon your site through Yahoo.
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He needs to man up and explain that he would like to focus on his new life as a husband and that he has a new family to nurture. That his parents did an amazing job raising him and guiding him so that he could become a great husband, that he’s very appreciative of their guidance, but now it’s time to let him focus on that.
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how do you get parents of a newlywed man to stay out of our business and stop calling on him for every little thing, just to say that she still has control of him..
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Your suggestion for newlywed is excellent. These sound like poisonous, controlling parents.
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Jajajajaja best Dr. Abby post ever!
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