Things I hate about everyone
1. People who say “can i borrow a kleenex?” Please keep it – I’m not going to want it back after you snot in it. That goes for a piece of gum, too.
2. People who put leashes on their kids – if you’re going to put a leash on them, could at least complete the dog transformation and give them a muzzle too?
3. People who claim to be devout Christians – and then motherf*%k you up and down.
4. People who feel bad for Tiger Woods.
5. People who “the grass isn’t always greener…” – it may not be greener, but at least your annoying ass isn’t on the other side.
6. Stupid People. I really just hate stupid people.
7. Born-again virgins. You lost your cherry – you can’t grow it back – so if you’ve done the deed (and got knocked up, Bristol Palin) – why become a born-again virgin?
8. People who “don’t smoke” until they are drinking and then mooch cigarettes off you all night. If you’re going to drink, stop and buy your own damn cigarettes.
9. Girls who THINK they are cute and adorable and then when they have three drinks, they are passing out on the ground or hanging all over their husbands, ready to pass out. How about you not suck down that bottle of vodka in 30 minutes and be able to carry on a conversation for a while that does NOT involve guido’s from Jersey Shore or the whores from the Kardashian show…
10. Guys who are gay and won’t admit it. There’s nothing wrong with being gay. So just come out already. Don’t hide it, be proud of it. Stop acting like you’re looking for a girlfriend when, really, you’re gay.
11. Men with Napoleon complexes. You’re short. Get over it. You don’t have to develop an ego the size of Texas to overcompensate. We know you’re little.
12. People who insist upon giving advice incessantly – and thinking that they are ALWAYS right – when they have no basis for giving advice. Unless it’s advice on how to get evicted, how to NOT marry your baby’s Mama, how to lose your job repeatedly or how to dress like a ghetto hood rat, you should probably keep your mouth shut. Unless you’re advising other ghetto hood rats and then preach away. (I’d have put in a picture of Crazy Gabe but I’d rather not immortalize him on my blog LOL picture Dr. Phil but shorter, darker and crazy jerry curl with a major receding hairline LOL)
13. Fat bitches who wear clothes that are two sizes too small. I’ve said it before – I’m not a little girl, but I don’t try to show off every roll either. Just because it comes in “your size” doesn’t mean you should buy it, honey.
14. People who cheat and try to say there’s nothing going on. We all know there’s something going on, we truly don’t give a shit, and we think it makes you look like an ass when you try to deny it.
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